Moon Phase = halfWeather = Indian Summer is Here!Current reading = The Purpose of Painting - Angela D'aleo
Quote: "Our superior intellect will never be a match for their puny weapons! Look out! He has a board...with a nail in it!!!"
- The Aliens from The Simpsons

October 27, 1998

Today was a great day - L. and I went out to Defeated Creek today to hike and sketch. We went down I-40 to Carthage (the whopping little town whose claim to fame is Al Gore...yippee.) and I guided her through that wonderful little curvy road that passing by the dam and the overlook. I was worried at first - everywhere we went was 'Closed for Winter'. Even the overlook was closed today - which I didn't think they ever closed except for really bad, icy weather. We didn't let that stop us though - we just park on the side of the road and climbed over the fence.

Once we climbed up to the overlook, there were all kinds of things to see - spiders; ginko trees, fossils in the rock that the walls are built of...L. found this little praying mantis who had one green eye and one brown eye.

We stopped at the little store that's just outside of the park and bought some chips, soda and water (I like shopping here - a liter of water for .79!)...although, by the time we got to Defeated itself, I was halfway expecting to see it closed, too! We stopped at the picnic area and took some time to eat lots of wonderful junk food (and a little fruit). After that, we hit the trail. We found this spot off the trail about a mile in and there was a spot that was like the snail equivilent of the elephant burial ground - there were lots of snail shells under the rim of this huge, limestone boulder. We ended up sitting on some of the other huge boulders and we actually did get some sketches in - L. did some watercolors and I used graphite. We got to talking alot and got to really know each other better. I am so glad and grateful for such a wonderful friend like her.

I did have a scary moment while we were out on the trail - I lost my breath and couldn't get it back. It was like having pneumonia...without the pneumonia. No matter what I did, I could not get enough air and I stood there breathing as hard as I could - which at the time, wasn't all that hard. When I sat down and finally admitted that I thought that this loss of breath was connected to the classes we've found ourselves in this session, viola'. It disappeared and never came back. Later, I remembered a dream I had the night before the class change - E. herself told me to 'keep breathing' because I'd soon get to a point where I couldn't. (Knock me over the head!)

This wasn't the first time that it happened. It's happened several times during this past week - ever since it was announced that we were now in Sexuality and Soul Awareness. There are no physical symptoms of anything - it is just exactly as if I couldn't remember how to breathe. In class last night, I felt as if I was ready to run - and that in itself was frightening. It took everything I had to sit in that class and I could not get away fast enough afterwards. I even drew blood during the class and didn't realize it until I saw the blood on my hand and couldn't figure out where it came from.

This is not good. Not good at all. I don't appreciate it when a part of me tries to kill me.

I suppose that I'm going to have to call in that akashic reading pretty soon. I have to find out what the hell is going on. This class should not bother me this bad and I can't figure out why it is. I'll just ask E. about it - and M. too, just to be on the safe side.

I'm calling this entry finished for tonight. Good night, Sweetie and good breathing...


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